Disorder

The most amazing fact about Jesus, unlike almost any other religious founder, is that he found God in disorder and imperfection.   –Richard Rohr

“Wait, wait, wait!” I called weakly from the hospital bed, as the doctor whisked through the curtain and out of the room. He left mid-sentence, without even letting me ask a question.

That scene rather encapsulates the last few months of my life: disorder. I cannot possibly comprehend or control the things that have swirled around my boat like crashing waves. To top it off, a mystifying infection landed me in the ER, where the formula [5 hours = 5 min w/Dr] seems ever to hold, thus no time for silly questions. 

Were the internal microscopic invaders mirroring the external chaos of my life? Or were they just a random occurrence, part of a brute, unaware mechanism of nature? Either way, sitting alone in the bland inhumane and sterile room, I was the one who had to assign meaning to the event.

This sickness is not unto death. (John 11:4) Jesus teaches his followers to assign a different meaning to disorder. What can come from sickness, pain, evil? Merely this: creation, life, forgiveness, love, redemption, hope, and glory for “the Son of God.” 

As a Son of God, I will fill empty sick rooms with meaning, belief, and love. Amen.

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